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PostSubyek: jokes in english   Sun Aug 26, 2007 3:22 am

Here, you can all share all kinds of jokes in english here

Or you can also give comments about the jokes

I'll start first :

=================================
One day,
A young man goes into a pharmacy and
says to the pharmacist, "Hello,
could you give me condom. I'm
going to my girlfriend's place for
dinner and I think I may be
in with a chance!"

> >

The pharmacist gives him the
condom and the young man leaves. He
soon returns and says, "Give me
another condom because my girlfriend's
sister is very cute too. She
always crosses her legs in a
provocative manner when she sees me and I
think I might strike it lucky there too."

> >

The pharmacist gives him a
second condom and as the boy is
leaving he turns back and says, "Go on,
give me one more condom because my girlfriend's mum is also
pretty cute and when she sees me she
always makes eyes, and since she
invited me for dinner, think she is expecting me to make a move!

> >

During dinner, the young man
is sitting with his girlfriend on his left, the sister on his right
and the mum facing him.

> >

When the dad gets there, the
boy lowers his head and starts praying,
"Dear Lord, bless this dinner
and thank you for all you give us."

> >

A minute later the boy is
still praying, "Thank you Lord for your kindness."

> >

Ten minutes go by and the boy
is still praying, keeping his head
down.

> >

The others look at each other
surprised and his girlfriend is even
more surprised than the
others. She gets close to the boy and
says in his ear, "I didn't know you
were so religious."

> >

The boy replies, "I didn't
know your dad was a pharmacist!"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There is this miss universe
contest.....and the 3 finalists are
Miss USA, Miss Australia, and Miss
Singapore.

Now....the judges are asking 3
questions to the finalists..



The 1st question is: "name me an
electrical appliance starting with the
letter l..."miss USA is as confident
as ever, and replies straight
away: "..lamp...".

the judges say good....miss Australia
replies:"......light bulb...."

the judges say good.....


now miss Singapore is not too
sure......she finally
says:".....ladio...."

then the judges say:"....sorry, radio
doesn't start with letter l....."



Now the 2nd question is:".....name me
an animal starting with the letter l"

miss USA says
confidently:"....lion...."

the judges say good.....and miss
Australia says:"......leopard....."

the judges say good....and now miss
Singapore isn't too sure again....

she says:"...labbit..."

the judges say:"...sorry, rabbit
doesn't start with the letter
l.....and if you get the next question
wrong, I'm afraid you are out of the
contest...."



Now, the 3rd and last
question......:"name me a fruit
starting with the letter l....."miss
USA says:"....lime...."

the judges say well done.....miss
australia says:.....lemon...."

the judges say well done....

Now miss Singapore knows the answer
for once.....she is very confident
that she would make it to the next
round......

she says:".........LIEW
LIAN..........."



LIEW LIAN = Pronunciation for DURIAN
by the Chinese

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

a couple was sitting on a bench talking
until the woman asked something to the man
"Honey, what do you love most about me, is it my beautiful face, my hot body, or my inteligence>>"
the man looked at her from top to bottom, chuckled, and said:
"I love your sense of humour"

==================================================

One afternoon, a blonde goes to a barbershop to get a hair cut. Before the hair cut the blonde warns the barber to never remove the earphone plugged to her ears no matter what happened. 10 Minutes passed, the blonde fall asleep, and the barber is really disturbed by the earphone, so he unplugged the earphone and continue styling her hair. After the barber finished his job, the blonde was dead. He was panic and remembered about the earphone thingy, so he put it in his ears and hears, "Breathe in, breathe out, again, breathe in, breathe out".
====================================================================
Doctor Office etiquette

This is so true! They always ask at the doctor's office why you are there and you say in front of others what's wrong and sometimes it's embarrassing.

There's nothing worse than a Doctor's Receptionist who insists you tell
her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it.

An 86-year-old man walked into a crowded Doctor's Waiting Room. As he approached the desk, the Receptionist said, "Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor for today?"

"There's something wrong with my dick," he replied.

The Receptionist became irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a crowded Doctor's Room and say things like that."

"Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you," he said.

The Receptionist replied, "You've obviously caused some embarrassment in
this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong
with your ear or something and then discussed the problem further with
the Doctor in private."

The man replied, "You shouldn't ask people things in a room full of others, if the answer could embarrass anyone." The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered.

The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, "Yes?"

"There's something wrong with my ear," he stated.

The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. "And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?"

"I can't piss out of it," the man replied.

The Waiting Room erupted in laughter.
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Sun Aug 26, 2007 9:53 am

wakakaka...

nice jokes...

make more jokes, alright...

btw, who's CoRa anyway???
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Sun Aug 26, 2007 4:41 pm

i dont know
maybe one of the debatters from our class

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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Sun Aug 26, 2007 8:44 pm

gloryus wrote:
i dont know
maybe one of the debatters from our class

then who's she anyway...

sarah or vanessa... (sory if i'm wrong)...

or she's from other clazz...
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Sun Aug 26, 2007 9:03 pm

a misterious person

tegang..........
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Sun Aug 26, 2007 11:09 pm

CoRa...

r u a boy???

or a girl???

who r u???
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Sun Aug 26, 2007 11:10 pm

maybe none of them
(then what is it?)

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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Mon Aug 27, 2007 1:10 am

CoRa...

tell us who r u???
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Mon Aug 27, 2007 10:26 pm

cora
what are u?

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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Tue Aug 28, 2007 12:18 am

gloryus wrote:
cora
what are u?

A human must be, right?
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Tue Aug 28, 2007 12:19 am

not that
i mean a boy or a girl

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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Tue Aug 28, 2007 3:08 am

gloryus wrote:
not that
i mean a boy or a girl

i think cora is a boy...

because cora play rf en dota...

are de girl play that game???
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Tue Aug 28, 2007 6:05 pm

i think coracora in dufan
wakakaka...
funt.funny.funny~


Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Tue Aug 28, 2007 6:14 pm

@dimas
some girl play dota
@ganda
hat do you mean??

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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Wed Aug 29, 2007 3:36 am

gloryus wrote:
@dimas
some girl play dota
@ganda
hat do you mean??

yeah i know...

but can you give me one name...

maybe ganda want to say that he thinks CoRa is cora"...

u know cora", right? in dufan???
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Thu Aug 30, 2007 7:23 pm

I feel sorry about Hansen who is suspected girl because of hi feminism name, Cora...hahahhahahha
But it's kin a funny Sen!!! Even it got a lil' bit mature.....hehe
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Thu Aug 30, 2007 11:24 pm

so, u want 2 say that CoRa iz Hansen...

really? hahahahaha...

so, now we know who's Cora anyway...

good"...

wakakaka...
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Sat Sep 01, 2007 10:12 pm

so cora is hasen
dimazzzzz cora is hansen why at school you say cora is not hansen
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Mon Sep 03, 2007 6:38 pm

hahaha
thats funny

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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Thu Sep 06, 2007 6:59 pm

why did he change his acc ??
_____________________________________________________________
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Thu Sep 06, 2007 11:50 pm

maybe because he love rf online

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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Sat Sep 08, 2007 8:29 pm

gloryus wrote:
maybe because he love rf online

maybe yes, maybe no...

who knows...

hehehehehe...

god knows anythink...

then ask god...
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Wed Sep 12, 2007 7:24 pm

Hey hey, back to topic please...

*well,, i don't have any funny topic right now, so just give something funny and maybe i will give a comment about it.. okok???
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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Sat Sep 15, 2007 12:47 am

ok...
a jokes...

kenapadinamakannasi?

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PostSubyek: Re: jokes in english   Sun Sep 16, 2007 10:51 pm

gloryus wrote:
ok...
a jokes...

kenapadinamakannasi?

ente udah masukin iniy di tempat yg laen khan...

karenadinalaper...

iniy jg jawabanx tergantunk dr maksud pertanyaanx
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